Sunday, September 30, 2007

Losing it

I know I've really overdone things when despite checking my calendar and blog I've still lost an entire day. S'not good. Not good at all. Still, maybe it'll come to me while I write this....probably it won't, but I can kid myself for now. Until I forget that I've forgotten an entire day that is!

So, as we've established, apart from knowing that I wrote a blog post, Thursday is gone from me. I wish I could tell you I'd been out, got smashed and had a wild, madly passionate orgy with hugely sexy, beautiful men with muscled, oiled bodies but I think someone else must've had that day even though it was really meant for me. Honest it was. Shame. Those men sound really rather nice. I suspect my day was much less interesting and that as is typical when I'm a bit knackered I wandered my way round the interweb going back to the same page twenty seven times thinking each one's the first, and probably slept. Lots.

I'd been to the dentist and then trailed round the supermarket on the way back so it was really lovely to go to neighbour's on Friday evening. It was a real neighbourhood gathering as neighbour chick who lives in the next road was there too and we were joined by neighbour's cousin. Neighbour cooked roast dinner, yum! As it so often does when women get together the talk turned to sex, and after we warmed up on the various merits of Johnny Depp versus George Clooney, it got quite dirty. We all had wildly different ideas about what was acceptable with neighbour chick insisting 'she wouldn't put a penis in her mouth, ewww' and howling with horror at me for making dirty jokes about 'dirty bum sex' and insisting everyone needed at least one toy. I'm still horrified I was the only woman in the room who owned a sex toy, now that's shameful.

We had dinner really early evening so it was crash out in front of the tv and read around blogland before bed at some ridiculously early hour.

Saturday brought high drama to bendy towers (well, some dramatic license!) the noise of a helicopter overhead became overpowering drawing most of the neighbours outside to find the police helicopter hovering almost directly above our houses. Some of us were more affected by this than others, lying on the floor with our hands above our heads and whimpering 'they've come to get me' but of course soon recovered with a bit of a slap from the others. Once all stupid jokes were out of the way neighbour and I went outside where we saw a policeman with his dog heading round the back of the houses. Just as he disappeared from sight Ziggy's friend Zelda appeared looking rather concerned at the numbers of policemen swarming around. Neither of us knew where Ziggy had disappeared to since he'd not turned up to see me the previous evening and he wasn't home to meet Zelda so she'd had a momentary panic when seeing all the policemen outside his house. Ziggy is notorious for having random and crazy things happen around him, but he's far from a criminal.
Zelda came in to wait for Ziggy and we both straight out to the back where all the other neighbours were watching what was going on. The policeman was searching through the back alleys and some of the back gardens with the dog, so clearly someone had been very naughty.

With characteristic comic timing Ziggy turned up just as the policeman had gone, despite it being late afternoon still part drunk from the night before and part just thinking about whether to start again. It ended up being just thinking about it as later on we all smoked some dope and heckled through both shows of the X-factor. You've gotta love car crash tv. Simon Cowell is still my shame turn on, though I've thought about it and it can only be the power thing.

Today has involved the by now obligatory slog to buy chocolate, and eating it all as well. Ah well, never mind, at least the first part is vaguely healthy. In a vague way.

And I still can't remember Thursday. Ah well. It'll come to me I'm sure. Maybe next Thursday.

6 comments:

Vi vi vi vooom!!!!!!!! said...

I've forgotten days in the past, but tht's normally down to drinking too much vodka. ;P

ScroungingNortherner said...

hey Bendy.
I can't remember how I ended up here,hours ago,but I went back to the start of your blog and read the lot.Although,I only skimmed the "Big" posts.Its obvious you care deeply for the man,and I felt a bit voyeuristic reading them.
But I just want to drag 'plod' by the ear and force his face in there..Tell him I've volunteered to demonstrate the technique-see if the threat of competition gees him up.
Thanks for the great blog.Take care.

Casdok said...

I wish I could tell you I'd been out, got smashed and had a wild, madly passionate orgy with hugely sexy, beautiful men with muscled, oiled bodies. But like you, i cant!
Or maybe thats where you day went???!!

Ian said...

You need help.

I am able to supply that in Charlie (charley). Please visit.

BenefitScroungingScum said...

Vi, no vodka involved. Maybe I should take it up, think of all the days I might get back?!?!

Casdok, ooh, were you there with me? Tell me we enjoyed it at the least ;) !!

ScroungingNortherner Hey yourself and welcome. Please don't feel voyeuristic (unless of course that does it for you!?) Big has this site address and gave me his full consent to being blogged about although I don't think he chooses to read here.
Thanks for the offer of technique demonstration though! I'll pass it on, but no need to worry, BYM and I aren't having a relationship so I shall start seeking men who don't need the threat of competition soon enough!

Ian. Offering to supply me class A drugs in public is generally frowned upon, although kind of you I suggest you try one of the police blogs instead. They'll welcome you with open arms and gorgeous shiny bracelets.

Casdok said...

Oh yes, we enjoyed ourselves!
Must do it again!