The Great Toy Review

6/15/2008 09:24:00 pm BenefitScroungingScum 15 Comments

Thanks to Lovehoney's generosity in giving vibrators away, I actually ended up with four toys to try and an enormous cardboard box. Kitty #2 got the box to play with in an attempt to keep her from jumping on my head whilst I was road testing the toys. Unfortunately she was not fooled by my paper based bribes and throughout the entire experiment jumped on and off the bed yowling her displeasure.

I'm glad someone did. Express their annoyance that is, as everyone else involved in the experiment (limited to humans only) seemed to be having a great time. The rabbit I'd ordered for the friend who'd never seen, let alone used a vibrator clearly went down a storm as I received a text long before bedtime just saying "Fantastic! TY". At that time I was still too busy trying to break into all the packaging and wondering exactly what the bin men were going to think of me when they found it all. Good job I removed that red lightbulb really.

Having listened to all the advice you kindly gave, I then completely ignored it and got carried away by Lovehoney's free offers. I was tempted by the fun factory toys as I love my existing one, but unfortunately they all seemed to have the same snap shut cover for the batteries and that's the only problem with the one I have, my hands aren't big enough or strong enough to work the squeeze and pull mechanism. No matter how great the toy, if it doesn't have a simple twist off battery cover it's not going to be any good for me. It's not the best way to choose a vibrator though.

I settled on the tulip wand as Ms Cake speaks so highly of hers, and the silicone bendy,which as someone previously commented must've been made for me! The other toys came free.

The only issue with batteries was the mountain I needed to power this little lot. Thank goodness for rechargeables! I settled myself down for an early night surrounded by sex toys, tubes of lube and dirty photos of the captain.

When I saw the gecko (one of the free toys) I thought it looked quite promising. Similar principle to the rabbit, but much more sensibly proportioned. Touching it wasn't quite so promising though as although the edges weren't sharp as such, they were harsh and a bit hard to the touch. The best I can say about this toy is that it was uncomfortable to use.

The silicon bendy was next. It turned out to be quite a basic toy, the attraction being that it's both bendy and waterproof. It wasn't quite bendy enough for my liking, but I admit my standards of bendable may not be the same as others. All in all I think this would be an excellent toy for couple play, but as a solo it wasn't quite up to the task.

The tulip
was a different matter! Now I know why Ms Cake loves hers so much. It's deceptive looking as it packs a considerable punch, so much so that at first I found the lowest setting a little too much. It's easy to get used to though, and it's length takes any strain off your hands. I'd think it would be particularly good for anyone who has an issue with reach, and I suspect you could even use it with a wrist or hand strap quite easily.

I'm in the minority of women who require some sort of penetration to orgasm, so although the tulip was wonderful, I needed to use it alongside another toy. The Sue Johanson G-spot toy worked brilliantly in this situation. Where the rabbit had been an issue size wise, this combination was great as it left the positioning down to me, and without a rotating shaft I wasn't worrying about internal bruising.

The G-spot toy was particularly good as the shape meant it would stay in place on it's own, leaving the hands free to manipulate the tulip. I suddenly realised just why so many women rave about their rabbits when I was able to work both together-like the text said, Fantastic!


Trixie said...

Oh I sooo need to go on that site and order some toys. My thumper needs to be replaced.

Slip said...

Sounds like some mighty fine road testing going on!

Anonymous said...

still no replacement for real thing
;-) i did offer lol

Dark Side said...

Sounds like great fun, I can see the

I have tagged you over on the dark side...x

Trixie: Well, Freddy is going cheap, only one female owner, well cared for, exceptionally low mileage!lol In all seriousness the amount of offers lovehoney put on and the half price offer to replace your rabbit if you recycle it should make it more affordable than most places. Can't wait for your reviews!

Slip: Indeed, fine, fine, fine ;)

Jurid: You're so is no replacement for the real thing ;)

Emma: Absolutely! I'll check out the dark side soon as I can x x

working two vibes at once, too much for me...I'm no good at multi-tasking!!

Anonymous said...

hehehehe.. now that's what friends are for.. Thankyou Bendy for the review lol I am off to check out the G-spot *whistles*

cheers Kim

EmmaK: Neither am I...happily this is a put it in and leave it there to entertain solution;)

Kim: lol, too right! Let me know how you get on ;)

Anonymous said...

Hiya .... Mind has been boggling since I first read this. :-0 When is the Which report coming out?

Ok, I need to go take a cold shower about now......

Unixman: Which there's a thought ;)

Mr Nighttime: Don't get too cold, it's bad for the external organs or something!

kingmagic said...

Lil sis!...I'm gobsmacked!
Big bro x

Joanna Cake said...

Glad to be of service and that is exactly how I use my tulip... it's great on its own but I too need penetration so in conjunction with a gspot stimulator set in place by yourself (or a significant other), it is the business! Im so glad you've managed to find some things to suit x

KM: Big bro, I know...mam'll go into orbit over this one ;) x

Cake: TY honey, so am I! x x

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